Archive for the ‘tenderness of wolves’ Category

I’ve just woken from a dream, perhaps in more ways than one. In my dream: women and children were running, hiding, protecting themselves from men, wild murderous men, but there were even some men, protecting us women and children from themselves, creating boundries that they could communicate through but not get through. They felt fearful of themselves and the damage they could do. I was very afraid in the dream, running a number of times from different types of situations, sometimes it seemed as if very real violence was coming at me, but mostly(if not all) it was the intent of violence, the sirens or the sun setting, (there seemed to be a time element to the onset of the violence) The women I was with constantly changed, from my mother and daughter, to biological sister, to my blood sisters, then there were random women, but ALWAYS was there this sense of defending eachother, of looking out for one another, well to a degree… There was a woman, really pregnant, just due, that had moved around/past me in an anonomus state. Then again later she seemed so seperate from the rest of us. Then the last time I saw her, she had impaled her stomach with round spiky hair brush, blood all over it, then she left to die.

There was one scene where we were being rushed out of somewhere (with sirens), so that we could survive, and the getaway vehicle was a flat bed truck with it’s flat bed tilted down so that we could run and jump on to it, pulling eachother up to safety.

The men that were protecting us from themselves were very sad, as well as adament that the precautions were nessecary. Constantly creating distance but remaining present.

I woke with a start, aware of the many layers… Man and his beast, a subject of study yesterday. Being afraid of it as women and children, men being afraid of their own. Women can access this beast too, we’ve been breeding that kind of woman for a while now, one that can totally override the heart matter and switch on the violence, the power over.

Are we all just the animal under the thin veneer of cultural training over the top. BUT is that animal truly violent? the difference between the ability to kill and the creulty to others that only humans seem to be capable of??

Phil Cleary spoke at the Readings part of the V-Day Festival. His twenty year journey since the violent murder of his sister, whose killer was given a reduced sentence due to the law of provocation, Phil’s life, a powerful life. He has been part of removing this “law of provocation” that states, the “madness” a woman can instil in a man makes it not really his fault… which smells of the open meat statements.

As my psyche seems to be sifting through all of this theory in my dreams, I am struck by another reading done that weekend, about the tenderness of wolves, the sweet absence of blood among preditors.

In theory, the bigger our brains got, the more we could think, we began to seperate ourselves from the animal nature of being the animal that we are, with instincts. There began the long journey of discovery of free will, choice, delayed gratification, reward and punishment, power over… and perhaps now, a gentle blossoming of the power within.

As the globe over begins to question, change and embrace this next level of women/men relations… we have a chance to explore that which can be created…

An ode to waking up!


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